When Love Stays
How a Young Widow’s Grief with a Growth Mindset Can Bring God Glory — COMING FALL 2023!!!
“It’s Stage IV Stomach Cancer. And it’s spread,” said the immaculately dressed doctor.
“Get to an oncologist right away. Don’t wait…”
As soon as the doctor who delivered that news to us turned the corner as he walked away from us, our lives were forever changed.
My book When Love Stays is a journey through the grief process to find Harmony, as told by a young widow.
The first section outlines the five years after the terminal illness diagnosis, and how I became a caregiver to my dying 36 year old husband just before having our first baby. Five years of painful separation from normal life, a healthy body, and an intact marriage. Is there hope for me to make it through this?
The second section of the book outlines the deep grief after the first few years after my husband’s death. The liminal process of in-between living. I’m no longer married. Yet I’m also not myself anymore. How do I do this, God - you ask yourself? Can I find hope for something better?
The third section of the book outlines the years beyond deep grief, finding your bearings to finally make it to Harmony and build a new life. This is where you find hope again in following God to your new home. Harmony awaits!!!
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When Love Stay’s Definition of Grief:
Grieving is verbally sharing how bad it gets as you feel deep emotions over the death of a person and the loss of a faithful relationship, trusted community, and solid identity you once had after a death (or death of a relationship) occurs. Grieving happens when you’re virtually or physically face-to-face with a safe person making eye contact with them as you cry and talk through the pain and sadness you feel. Healing from grief occurs when getting your emotional needs met, and from having someone listen deeply (there’s that empathy, attunement, and containment again!). Healing has closure when you feel you’ve talked about each loss aspect you’re missing without that faithful person, trusted community, and solid identity in your life any longer, from sharing your sorrow, pain, and tears over this situation. After the bulk of the deep grief is shared with someone (or multiple people at various times) witnessing your grief in this season, you can say that, once again, you feel authentic, organized, and restored from your closure rather than being stuck in a holding pattern without direction, perspective, or clarity.
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